so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
and she was petting her beer can
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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