We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
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