omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize