You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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