I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
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