tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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