haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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