For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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