No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize