Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
