I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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