Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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