just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
