i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
