Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
