And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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