also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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