I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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