I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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