Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
do herpes really smell.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
