I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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