Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
