Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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