your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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