ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I think my fart just growled at me.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
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