he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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