yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize