Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
