But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
