I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Randomize
