You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect