He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
