covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
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