So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
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