How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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