Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Randomize
