Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize