Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Randomize
