GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
