I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
