I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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