So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize