I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
