i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
