Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize