is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
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