You really coming over, don't trick.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
