my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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