exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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