then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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