2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
